That is how we decided it was time to add a special project to U Power Change:

As we shared before U Power Change is making some big improvements as we really dive in to focus on our values of love, inclusion, family, community, diversity, and social justice.  Our mission to work from a family lens and community context, so that we can create systemic change to build a loving and inclusive world is no small task. Though we know it is necessary especially with all of the violence and hate that we are witnessing.  

From the daily violence and hate that our adolescents are growing up around, to the ups and downs of being a teen, and our mission to support families we decided to create a special leadership and empowerment project to help and support adolescents and their parents and families.  

 

As the parents of our future generation of leaders we want to make sure they feel supported during this challenging age.  We know that when a teen is experiencing a behavioral, emotional, academic, or personal challenge it often can affect the whole family and create stress for the parents.  We also know that what happens in our community and society has an impact in our daily life.  This is why the U Power Change model of a family lens and community context is so successful for overcoming those social, emotional, behavioral, and academic challenges.  

 

So we invite you to be the first to get resources and hear the details about our Leadership and Empowerment Project.  If you are a parent of teens, work with teens, have teens in your life, or are just interested and would like to hear more about how to be involved in this special project we encourage you to sign up.

I need to share this parenting and advocacy moment with you and I wonder how many other people have had a similar situation.  As a parent (I’m a white mom with multiracial children), it is super important to me that my kids learn about cultural diversity, history, kindness, and making change in an unjust world.  I wrongly assumed that my children’s preschool (which we chose partially because of its cultural diversity of both students, staff, and admin and opportunity for bilingual education in Spanish) would know how teach Thanksgiving with historical accuracy and cultural sensitivity.  Nope. I was wrong.

 

The other day when I picked my son up from school, his teacher explained to me that they had split the class in half and for the Thanksgiving party they would be dressing up as “Pilgrims” and “Indians” so I should send him to school wearing black on Friday.  My stomach knotted up and my first thought was how do I respond effectively. I know that to some extent the teachers make the lessons and activities but that the school provides the curriculum. Plus, the teachers are the kindest, attentive, and most loving people so I know that this activity doesn’t line up with what they teach or how they treat others.  

 

I also feel conflicted as a white person explaining that this is racist to my son’s Latino teacher who has likely had first hand experience of racism.  So I respond in a very long run on explanation that it’s 2018 and that I want my children to learn the accurate history of thanksgiving in an age appropriate way that is respectful of indigenous people and that I’m concerned that this activity could be considered culturally offensive and appropriation.  (I used the word “could” even though I know it is for the purpose of the goal of softening the conversation to create a dialogue while keeping my goal in mind.) One of the hardest parts of this for me is that being a white person I’m still not always sure where my place is in having a conversation about racism with a person of color.  Other emotions that came up for me included feeling ungrateful since they do so much for my son and they care so much for him.

 

The situation was similar for the activity in my daughter’s 1 year old class.  They were to bring in white t-shirts that they would decorate with symbols from Thanksgiving but a picture of an “Indian” was brought up as one of the possible symbols.  I am also aware that some of the teachers may not have grown up in this country so besides it being a curriculum issue, it’s possible there may just be a lack of awareness.   

 

My next step was to approach administration but I wanted to gather resources first that I could bring to the school to help them discuss Thanksgiving respectfully, accurately, and age appropriately.  To my surprise in 2018, there were limited resources on the internet for actual activities for early childhood ages 1 through 3. Most resources started at age 4 and up.

 

Community is often one of the best places to get resources so this where I started.  I reached out to my Facebook communities including Read Your World; Teaching Literacy Skills with Diverse Books  and Are Those Your Kids? Navigating Multiracial Motherhood One Day At A Time to ask for recommendations.   

 

Here are some of the resources that I found helpful:  

 

Decolonizing Thanksgiving: A Toolkit for Combatting Racism in Schools

 

Native American Children’s LiteratureRecommended Reading List

 

Teaching Thanksgiving in a Socially Responsible Way

 

How To Talk To Kids About Thanksgiving

 

#IndigenousReads by Indigenous Writers: A Children’s Reading List

 

American Indians in Children’s Literature (AICL)

 

I approached the administration with these articles and resources.  They were appreciative and stated they would review and discuss the materials.  That’s the stage we are at right now. It’s a work in progress but I’m appreciative that they seem to recognize the importance of the issue and open to the dialogue.  Systemic change doesn’t happen overnight but planting the seeds are necessary.  Plus it is my responsibility to follow-up. 

 

Looking back I should have brought this up earlier.  At the beginning of the school year I should have asked how do you teach Thanksgiving?  I’m sharing this because it’s likely I’m not the only parent in this situation and because advocating for change is something that I often encourage of other parents and clients that I work with.  I always find it helpful when others share their journey and so I hope that you find the sharing of my experience helpful. I think it’s important to acknowledge that yes it can be messy but that if we believe in building a loving and inclusive world then we need our actions to show that.

 

Are you interested in staying connected and receiving more resources that supports love and inclusion for families and communities?  Join us here

Rorri Geller-Mohamed, LCSW is a family therapist, parent coach, love & inclusion coach, consultant, and founder of U Power Change.  She started U Power Change to bridge the gap and bring the necessary family lens and community context needed to help people successfully work through personal, relationship, and family challenges.  She specializes in working with interfaith, multicultural, and multiracial couples and families; adolescents and their families dealing with social, emotional, behavioral, and academic challenges, and non-traditional, modern, liberal and/or progressive individuals dealing with relationship, parenting, and family challenges.  You can reach her at Rorri@upowerchange.com.

 

As the Thanksgiving time and the holidays are approaching many of us may be having mixed emotions of excitement and joy as well as worry and anxiousness.  Even if you don’t celebrate a holiday in December, we often spend more time with our family and partner’s family because of being off of work. For those of us whose values may not align with the people we will be spending time with it is often a cause for anxiety.  Plus if you put kids in the mix we are also trying to figure out the best way to protect them and teach them the values we believe in.

 

For those of us who are in multicultural and interfaith relationships, identify as modern, liberal, and/or progressive, or are raising children in a multiracial, multicultural, or multifaith family and have people in our life that are conservative, close minded, or difficult to deal with this can really bring on a lot of stress.  Those of us breaking from traditions, starting new traditions and navigating a new path during this time for ourselves, relationship and family may also have a lot of thoughts swirling around in our minds. The end of the year can also be a time that brings up emotions like grief, loss, and sadness.

 

At U Power Change, we are all about helping you feel better and navigating the best path to having happiness and harmony.  That means that we use our family lens and community context framework to help you figure out the tough conversations, work through the challenges, and focus on what matters most to you.  Our goal is that you feel supported, empowered, and excited to take on the end of the year. We want you to have the opportunity to be happy, become more connected with your partner, and/or feel closer and more understood in your family.  

 

How can we support you?  We invite you to participate in our webinar next week to learn some ways to deal with mixed emotions, lower your anxiety, and relieve your stress during this time.  At the end of the webinar, you will be able to breathe a sigh of relief, feel prepared for any family gathering, and excited and encouraged to have a great end of the year.      

 

Interested in learning more? Check out this video here

 

Ready to register for the webinar?  Sign up here

 

Hope you will join us!

 

Rorri Geller-Mohamed, LCSW is a family therapist, love & inclusion coach, consultant, and founder of U Power Change.  She started U Power Change to bridge the gap and bring  the necessary family lens and community context needed to help people successfully work through personal, relationship, and family challenges.  She specializes in working with interfaith, multicultural, and multiracial couples and families; adolescent and parenting challenges, and non-traditional, modern, liberal and/or progressive individuals dealing with relationship, parenting, and family challenges.  You can reach her at Rorri@upowerchange.com.

P.S. Chat directly with Rorri: If you are going through a challenging time with a personal, relationship, or family issue please remember you don’t have to go through it alone.  Often we think we are the only ones dealing with that issue, we’ve tried everything and nothing seems to help, we avoid it because it causes conflict, or feel that must just be that way it is.  At U Power Change, we believe in transformation and have seen the impact our work has in improving the lives of individuals, couples, and families. You don’t have stay in a negative space. If you are ready to make things easier, experience a positive change, and/or improve your life, relationship, or family connection we would love to share how we can help.  It is amazing what a new perspective on a situation, having new ideas of how to approach it, and even just becoming aware of helpful resources can improve your life. If you would like to schedule a free 15-20 min brainstorming session video call with Rorri Geller-Mohamed, LCSW to get our perspective and ideas on a challenging situation and how we can help before THANKSGIVING send an email to Rorri@upowerchange.com with “Brainstorming Call” in the subject and your availability.    

How do we find hope when there are so many terrible things happening? How do we continue to work to build a loving and inclusive world?  How can these things be prevented?

 

These are definitely the questions that have been on my mind lately.  (So I included some resources at the end if it has been on your mind too).

 

As a family therapist here’s some of my quick thoughts using a family lens and community context:

 

Whenever we hear of the hateful shootings from the past 2 weeks, my first reaction is almost always why wasn’t this prevented and how can we prevent this in the future.  These things are preventable. People don’t just wake up one day and and commit murder. They have thoughts and behavior patterns that have often been going on for years that led to that moment.  How can we change systems so that this could have been prevented? We need to be intervening years earlier and not allowing people access to guns.

 

When we hear of the white teachers in Idaho that dressed like “Mexicans” and the president’s border wall for Halloween, consequences for these individual teachers is not enough.  We need to look at how this situation happened in the first place.  The hiring process, requirements for a teaching license and degree, curriculum, parent and community involvement, and anti-racism training all need to be examined at the school and district level.  What about the healing process for the children that are at the school and their families? That also needs to be addressed.

 

This is why it is so important to not only focus on an individual but also on the family, community, and world context.  We need to work with individual issues, family dynamics, and a systems approach if we want to see progress. Mental health counseling on its own is not enough.      

 

Looking for hope and inspiration?  Well here are some cool resources that you can check out and share as we work together to build a more loving and inclusive world:

 

A petition by California Educators Rising as anti-racist educators to condemn the behavior of the teachers at Middleton Heights Elementary School in Middleton, Idaho.

 

A Louder Than Ever: Vote Your Values video to encourage people to vote on Tuesday.

 

Sign up for Shaun King’s relaunch of the The North Star.  An abolitionist newspaper started by Frederick Douglass in 1847 “…to fight back against injustice, their stories had to not only be well told – with the color and dimension and nuance that was frequently missing elsewhere, they knew they needed a newspaper that represented the cause of liberation with urgency, clarity, heart, and soul.” -Shaun King

 

A new brochure  “I’m Muslim and I Might Not be Straight” to help “young Muslims feel supported in their sexuality, and help them feel supported in coming out, if they so choose to. The guide also explores the intersection of the Muslim faith and sexual orientation…” – Teen Vogue

 

So check out these resources, sign-up, and share. If you are in the U.S., create a plan and don’t let anything stop you from voting on Tuesday.  Now is the time…let’s create some change!!

 

Rorri Geller-Mohamed, LCSW is a family therapist, parent and relationship coach, speaker, and founder of U Power Change.  She uses a family lens and community context focus in all of her work. U Power Change works to strengthen families and overcome challenges while creating systemic change so that we can all live in a loving and inclusive multicultural, multifaith, and multiracial world.    

I want to first thank you for being part of the U Power Change community (you can stay updated on our resources and events here: email list) and let you know that I really appreciate your support.  I’m really excited to share with you the new and improved U Power Change that you will see revealed over the next few months.  I am committed and dedicated to refocusing and returning to why I initially started U Power Change and the impact that I hoped it would make in the world.

 

U Power Change values creating systemic change so that multicultural, multiracial, and interfaith/multifaith families, organizations, and communities can thrive while building an inclusive and loving world.  

 

In the past I’ve shared a lot about my interfaith marriage and raising multi-identity children but I haven’t shared much about my own multiracial, multicultural, and interfaith/multifaith upbringing and family life growing up.  Although it hasn’t always been easy for me to share in the past, growing up with that experience changed my life and impacted my worldview and in many ways was the catalyst for me creating U Power Change.

If you would like to hear more about my story, why U Power Change exists, and how U Power Change will be helping families and changing the world, you can join me on the U Power Change Facebook page on Thursday October 11, 2018 at 11am EST.  

 

To making a bigger impact,
Rorri

[Update: You may notice that today’s topic is a little different than previously.  I’m in the process of expanding, re-organizing, and re-vamping my programs, services, and website to better serve you, your family, and your communities.]

   

It can be hard when you are struggling with a personal or family problem and it feels like no matter what you do it’s not improving.  You may have asked a friend or professional for advice, searched the internet, or tried a self-help program. Often the missing piece to solving those kind of challenges is using a family lens.  By really understanding the problem within the context of the family, having a better understanding of the dynamics, the way each person is impacted, and how that relates to their response to the problem will help in finding the best solution.    

 

When working with clients, I often ask questions about their family of origin, their life growing up, and other family experiences.  The reason that I do this is because those stories and experiences often have an impact on their life today. By understanding those stories and recognizing patterns we are often able to uncover the root issue of challenges that they are facing and then begin to find solutions that fit those unique challenges.  

 

For example, let’s say your teenager is struggling in school and you are constantly arguing with them about how to do better.  Using a family lens allows us to look at the teenager within the context of the whole family. How long has this pattern of behavior been happening?  What has the family’s response been? What else might be going on in the family that is preventing your child from sharing more about their situation at school? You may perceive it as negative when in reality they didn’t to burden you because they knew you recently started a new job and didn’t need the extra worry. In their mind, they were helping you.  With the extra insight, we are able to create solutions to change that specific dynamic to build more open communication. With an increase in communication, you are then better able to address your child’s needs in school because you will have more details and awareness what’s going on in school.

 

This can work with your relationship with your partner as well. Let’s say you and your partner frequently argue about money. Maybe you have different ideas on spending and saving. Using a family lens, you can dig deeper to understand where both of your ideas around money came from growing up and how that may shape your relationship with money today. Revisiting the way money was talked about and used by your parents/caregivers and the meaning behind that may be exactly what you need to figure out how to resolve your money disagreements. Once you understand what the underlying issue is, you are able to find solutions that work.

 

The amazing thing about using a family lens is that it really allows you to dig deeper so that you can find lasting solutions and not just a quick band-aid approach.  You can try it on your own too. The next time youu or someone in your family is experiencing a challenge or conflict, take a look at the situation from a more broad view using a family lens.  Use that lens to dig deeper to really uncover the root of the challenge. Once you identify the root, you will see that solutions will come much easier. Go ahead, give it a try.

 

To using a family lens,

Rorri

Being in an interfaith and multicultural relationship is a learning process of how to bring different backgrounds to one union and a united family.  No one likes to talk about how they messed up but yet that is what I’m pushing myself to share with you. These same mistakes I made early on in my relationship seem to be common for many other couples too.  Relationship mistakes suck because someone usually ends up feeling hurt, ignored, or angry. So I hope that by sharing some of my mistakes with you, you can avoid making those same mistakes.

 

Here’s what I did wrong early on in my interfaith and multicultural relationship:

 

• I would get extremely frustrated with my partner every time we would get stuck having the same conversation over and over.  This would happen if I was talking to my partner and he didn’t see my point of view or why a certain issue was big deal for me.  We would end up having the same frustrating conversation again and again. At the time, we failed to recognize the negative pattern of communication that was happening.  We both have very different communication styles and did not know how use that to our advantage. By looking at our pattern of communication and taking it apart, we are able to stop that negative cycle of communication and actually move forward to understanding each other’s viewpoints.

 

• I would get angry at my partner for practices or beliefs that I disagreed with related to his religion.  Many of the things that made me angry were things that he didn’t even believe in, understand, or care about but yet I found myself expecting him to explain it or change it.  Many of these had historical and cultural implications. But either way I was being hard on him for something out of his control and his understanding. Learning more about his personal beliefs, family practices, religion, and various religious and progressive communities helped me to look at the bigger picture, understand better, and stop sabotaging a great relationship.  

 

• I would get upset and stressed out when we couldn’t immediately agree on how we would raise kids together.  Despite my professional therapy training, when it came to my own relationship I seemed to forget that having those conversations are a process and that I shouldn’t have expected an immediate solution.  I struggled to be in an in between space of not having some kind of specific answer that I was looking for. It changed when we acknowledged that it’s a process and reached out for help from a professional who had experience working with couples like us.  We were able to then have a guide and focus to help us with some of the challenges in those conversations.

 

Can you relate?  What kind of mistakes have you made?  Which mistakes are you hoping to avoid?  It’s not easy talking about mistakes or being vulnerable in a way that can help us avoid them moving forward.  But it can definitely make a difference if you are stuck in a hard place in your relationship. Acknowledge mistakes that have happened, ask forgiveness, be easy on yourself as a relationship is a learning process, and be conscious to prevent it from happening again.

 

To moving forward,

Rorri

 

P.S. Are you uncertain or worried about the future of your relationship?  Is it “on the fence” or has it been a rocky few months? Are you being pressure to convert or raise kids a certain way? Don’t keep feeling like that when you don’t have to.  I would love for you to participate in my online workshop at the end of the month where I will show you how to transform your relationship from rocky and unsure to happy and long lasting (even though you and your partner may have different religions, cultures, or backgrounds). If you want to join the workshop, send an email to Rorri@upowerchange.com with the word WORKSHOP to this email and I’ll be in touch.

P.P.S Looking for relationship or family advice? Sign up to get our newsletter and join the U Power Change Facebook community  Get tips and advice right to your inbox and join a supportive community of interfaith and multicultural couples and families that can relate to what you are going through.  

  

 

Over the weekend, I co-hosted the first Interfaith Counselors Live: Share and Support, a live facebook event, where we discussed an interfaith couple’s dilemma and different approaches and ideas for resolving it.  One of the themes that came up was life transitions and how common this is for people to sometimes to get stuck on issues as a couple during these times.

 

Big changes can be stressful on us.  Whether you are starting a new job, moving in with your partner, getting married, having a child, or any other transition it can impact how you feel.  It can be exciting and happy but also cause feelings of uncertainty and stress. And what often happens when we feel stress is that it can not only impact us but also impact those who are closest to us like our partner.  Sometime we may not even realize we are doing it in the moment but we can take it out on our partner. That can often end in tension or conflict that then just builds on our stress.

 

So what can we do to make transition times easier when we have major life changes:

 

1. 1. Be easy on yourself.  Adjust your expectations.  Don’t expect for everything that you usually get done to get done and be the same way it always is.  Try not to put too much pressure on yourself or your relationship for things to be a certain way. Remind yourself that things will go back to normal but now is not the time to expect that to happen.

 

1. 1. Communicate with your partner.  Talk about how you are approaching this big transition and what you can both do to support each other.  Decide ahead of time how to de-escalate and deal with challenges that may come up when you are under extra stress. This helps to prevent any big blow ups at each other.

 

1. 1. Live in the moment.  Remember that transitions are only temporary and it will pass.  Lean into the positive aspects of the transition. You only get this moment once so make the most of it.

 

1. 1. Take a step back.  Look at the bigger picture.  Think about what initiated this change and what the bigger hope or goal was from it.

 

1. Practice self-care.  Do your best to take good care of yourself during this time.  Exercise even something simple like taking a short walk after a busy day.  Eating right to make sure that you are keeping yourself healthy during this time. Also, doing your best to get enough sleep.

 

So if you are going through a big transition, keep in mind that it is only temporary but that it can be very helpful to have support.  Be open with your partner, family, and friends that you can use a extra support during this time. If you notice that your transition time is lasting longer than you hoped or that it feels very overwhelming, you can also reach out for help from a counselor.  Don’t let yourself stay in a difficult space for too long when you don’t need to. There are so many emotions that big changes in your life can bring up. Communicating with your partner is key in helping your relationship thrive during those times.

 

What about your relationship?  What can you do to prepare your relationship now to handle life changes in the future?

 

To thriving in transitions,

Rorri

 

P.S. Are you looking for ways to strengthen your relationship, move forward, or get unstuck? Here are a few ways I can help:

 

1. Join my FREE U Power Change Community on Facebook to get relationship tips, advice, and meet other people in a similar situation.
2. Join my revamped Mix Match and Blend Relationship and Family program to help couples at a crossroad in their relationship move forward.  Strengthen your relationship with your partner and your family as you navigate your way to a happy life and long lasting relationship.   
3. Schedule your free relationship consultation with me.  We’ll meet for a short video call where you can tell me about your relationship struggles and challenges and I can provide you with my perspective, recommendations, and how I might be able to help.  Send an email to Rorri@upowerchange.com with the word CONSULT in the subject and I’ll contact you to set it up.

Are you at a crossroad in your relationship?  Are you unsure if it is worth your time and energy trying to work on it?  Do love your partner but a lot of issues keep coming up? Do you have times when things are great but also times when it feels really hard?  If you said yes to any of these questions, know that you are not alone.

 

It’s actually not that uncommon to be in a relationship that could use improvement.  Many of us need to work on communicating with each other better, solving problems in a more effective way, and being more aware of the role our upbringing plays in our thoughts and actions.  After all, aren’t we all really a work in progress trying to be better versions of ourselves?

 

Staying in a place in your relationship where it feels like an emotional roller coaster isn’t healthy and won’t make you happy.  So how do you know if there is potential to go from where your relationship is now to be stronger, happier, and healthier?

 

Here are the 4 signs that your relationship has the potential to grow and be better than you can imagine:

 

1. You are BOTH committed to working on improving it.  I can’t stress the both enough.  It can’t be that just one of you wants it to work.  You both have to actually want it to get better. You both have to be willing to make changes together to improve it. It’s ok if you aren’t sure how to get there but you need to be open to trying.
2. You need to both be willing to do something different than you have tried before. Obviously, what you have already tried hasn’t worked yet so don’t expect to keep doing the same thing and get different results.  You won’t. You need to build new skills to improve what isn’t working. You need new techniques and strategies to break out of old patterns.  This may look like relationship coaching or counseling, a relationship program or class, doing a relationship workbook together, or anything else that will help you learn new ways of handling your challenges.
3. You know that there is a possibility of a future for you together. You love each other. You have fun together. You enjoy spending time together.  You miss each other when you are apart. You can imagine it getting better.
4. The relationship means enough to you that if for some reason it didn’t work out, you would at least want to know that you had given it your all.  You would be disappointed knowing that it ended without you trying your hardest.  You can appreciate learning more about yourself and how to be the best person and partner that you can be because you know that no matter what happens you can carry that with you.

 

Does your relationship have potential but are you unclear of what to do next to fix it?  Are you ready for it to be happier, healthier, and stronger but unsure of how to get there?

 

Here are some ways that I can help you:

 

1. Join my FREE U Power Change Community on Facebook to get relationship tips, advice, and meet other people in a similar situation.
2. Join my revamped Mix Match and Blend Online Relationship and Family Program to help couples at a crossroad in their relationship move forward.  Strengthen your relationship with your partner and your family as you navigate your way to a happy life and long lasting relationship.
3. Schedule your free relationship consultation with me.  We’ll meet for a short video call where you can tell me about your relationship struggles and challenges and I can provide you with my perspective, recommendations, and how I might be able to help.  Send an email to Rorri@upowerchange.com with the word CONSULT in the subject and I’ll contact you to set it up.

 

Interested in getting more relationship and family advice and tips like this right to your inbox? Sign up for the U Power Change mailing list        

 

Rorri Geller-Mohamed, LCSW is a family therapist, relationship coach, and founder of U Power Change.  She helps couples and families strengthen their relationships, prevent and heal strained family relationships, and guides them to a happy and harmonious life.  She is passionate providing multiracial, multicultural, and multifaith couples and families with opportunities and resources to meet their unique challenges. Outside of her professional training, her unique perspective comes from being in an interfaith relationship (she is Jewish and her husband is Muslim), raising her 2 young children in a multicultural and multifaith environment, and her upbringing in a multiracial family with a sibling that is Latino.

Our Navigate To Happy Challenge just finished and one common theme that came up is how helpful it can be to have a new fresh way to look at a situation that you are experiencing.  Sometimes when we are frustrated or angry at our partner it’s hard for us to really look at that situation from a different perspective. But by having a new way of looking at it, it opens up our opportunity to try new ideas and solutions to fix it.

A client I worked with struggled to get her father to be accept her relationship with her partner.  One of my suggestions to her was to take a step back and really check in about where his resistance was coming from.  I wanted her to find out what he feared would happen if he welcomed her partner into the family. What was he really worried about?  In his mind, what would her life look like if she and her partner stayed together? Also, what would his life look like? How might his life change?  By looking at the problem differently, you are then able to work on coming up with solutions to those concerns and take steps to improve the situation.

As a therapist and relationship coach, a lot of the work that I do with clients is helping them to reframe the problem they are experiencing in a new way.  Some of the ways that we do this is by taking a step back and looking at the bigger picture, getting a better understanding of the problem from the other person’s perspective, and looking to see if it’s part of a negative pattern that impacts you.

So the next time you are going through a rough time or feeling completely stressed or frustrated, reframe the problem you are experiencing and watch a whole new world of solutions and ideas appear to show you how to move forward.

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